Dreams Of A Thousand Bandits: Part 1

    Training. There was so much training. Xander was falling behind as so many others accepted their fate in this video game world, he was still, in some ways, treating it as the game. Being that instead of reaching beyond the video game's restrictions, he was keeping himself bound to them.

This had to stop.

He already trained his physical attribute, to help make himself stronger, now he was working on his defensive skills to max those. In this it meant not only taking part in more drills alongside the other Salamander soldiers, but also training missions out in the desert.

    Though his Patron, Mizufa Trude, had a request for him. A nasty group of raiders were causing problems for the trade routes and she would 'appreciate' if he went to deal with the problem. That brings us to the now, Xander walking along one of the trading routes out in the open sand plains.

He has dressed himself as a 'merchant', or at least covering over his gear to make it seem like he was one. With him was a wagon, two other Salamander guards to help the look, a secondary wagon, and the choice his fellow adventurers had to either hide in the covered wagon or take part in the merchant act.

Now with it being flat grounds, the raiders should be easy to see coming their way or should be. The fact this was one of the hot spots for this assault was interesting, because it then got into the 'how'. How were they catching these merchants off guard?

Goldenblade is walking along with the caravan through Westelande, where she is some sort of official with the military. It's not entirely clear. She normally wears the badge boldly, but it's now covered up under a plain, pale dustcloak and hood arrangement that prevents the sun from beating down on her too badly. Her weapons are under the cloak also, so she appears like just another person, walking along with the caravan, which is just as it should be. The bandits will not know until its too late what they have done. Normally, she rides through the desert on a horse with no name, but she's left it behind, it'd stand out too much, around here, and they'd know that Westelande had sent in the heavy hitters.

    Considering she is also in the middle of training her shielding abilities, Fukaziroh shouldn't be caught dead, literally, without her armour. Which really doesn't explain why she's decided to wear the harem outfit Gwen made for her. For that, one has to understand a few things. For one, Fuka enjoys looking cute and has no sense of shame. For another it's the freaking desert, so there's no way she's going to hide her armour under her coat and other things she would normally do. Of course there's also the whole thing about how the group of them aren't supposed to look deadly dangerous, and what's less lethal looking than a smol sylph in harem garb? This latter amuses the absolute hell out of Fuka, naturally. And finally... her training really isn't about armour at all. It's mostly about using her unique set of shielding spells appropriately!

    In any event she's tickled pink, not literally so of course, to be invited to help defend a caravan. "Do you think we're going to run into air or earth?" she asks. "Like, I could see an earth elemental. But I could also see like sandstorms!" she offers, gushing enthusiasm. "And those are two entirely different things to shield against! Or I suppose raiders might use fire but that's boring OH WAIT what if they use water wouldn't that be incredible?!"

Kaydon is a mercenary, even if he doesn't act like it a lot. He does still love getting paid to help people out, even if those people are his friends like Xander. So the ping of an invite came through and Kaydon made his way down to hear the briefing.

"Sounds simple enough." He says, as he looks across at the group. He is doing his best to just pretend to be a simple guard, to allow the raiders to think they're getting the drop on the caravan. He has a cloak pulled up over his head, and is currently in his human form, he'll change into his were fang form when the moment is right to actually engage the raiders, once they reveal themselves.

"I hope we don't have to use FIRE!", Uta blurts out, hunched over, forearms held tight between her knees. She also is somehow decked in Gwen's signature desert outfit, and because of this, she hasn't stopped blushing since they left. Also constant squirming. "I am not that good with Fire. The sooner we arrive, the better." For the umpteenth time, she straightens up, cranes her neck, and looks around. "If we're lucky, we could reach our destination without any incident. I hope we reach our destination without any incident. And that we don't have to use Fire."

    Xander peers over to Uta, he can't tell if she is putting up an act or has already forgotten that they are not transporting anything-- other than themselves. He looks then over to Golden, to Kaydon, before his eyes fall on Fuka, "Hopefully neither, but be ready for both." Is all he says on the matter.

As they continue, Xander continues to peer out. There was not a soul in sight, outside of them. Trails of wagon wheels before, but not a single thing. There was also only the sound of the wind, not even a passing insect. "... stay sharp." Is all his rumbles out.

        ----------------

DM Note: Possible trouble here, sniff it out, search it out with keen eyes, or however your fancy.

        ===============

        -- Roll Results --

Goldenblade was the first to detect something was off. Like the ground had been disturbed. Fuka would be just like Golden, but she could see the shadow lines where the ground looked slightly lifted and a small wire directly ahead.

Kaydon sadly finds that his sensitive nose is being thrown off by the sands of the desert, as you know the saying, sand finds a way to get into everything.

Uta is-- being Uta. Doing Uta things, because-- Uta!

        

Goldenblade accepts the admonishment to stay sharp and scans the horizon with a critical eye. She's a bricklayer, though, so she's not accustomed to looking for people hiding in ambush, about to jump out at her. She's an in-your-face type, all the skullduggery frustrates her. "They ought to make a sign, 'Bandits wait here', so you can go straight there," she complains, squinting into the sunlight. Uta and Fuka in harem outfits amuse her, and while they're definitely a disguise, it seems to be upsetting Uta. Who seems to be having more and more issues with Fire, too. "You won't have to use fire," she says calmly. "You haven't had to use fire since you've been in the game, why would you need it now?"

Fuka's speculation draws a shrug. "You kids and your magic blasts. What will you do if they come at you with steel?" She actally knows Fuka is tough, but the ubiquitousness of the magic has gotten under her skin lately. At least Kaydon is keeping it together. She nods his way and will allow her glace to scan the distance again. "Something's going on," she warns quietly, not loudly enough to carry beyond the immediate group. More loudly, she calls, "Stop the wagon, I think someting's wrong with the wheel." There's nothing wrong with the wheel, she just wants an excuse to check out this odd wire and lifted terrain ahead.

"I'm not much of a mechanic, but I can take a look at it." Kaydon replies, though he's worked with Goldenblade enough to know that tehre's probably more at play than just a weird issue with a wheel.

"Or should I keep my eyes on the horizon, perhaps?" He wonders, though that last line is said in a quieter voice, just for Goldenblade.

    "You know we're here to *have* an incident, right?" Fuka teases Uta. "To lure the bandits in with a show of a little skin~?" she continues, shimmying in a manner that's calculated more to make Uta blush than to actually be alluring. "I'm sure though if we need to heat things up, you won't have to do it all alone!" she adds, sure that doing so will raise some heat. In Uta's blushing if nothing else!

    Fuka shrugs towards Goldenblade idly. "Probably kill them all." she says offhandedly. "I can spare a few for you, I guess? But if they really want to charge the wielder of Frank, I'm game!" she grins. She's a magical sort of girl, yes, but primarily Fuka's first a strong and tough wielder of a heavy blade. The magic, as it were, is actually secondary.

    As fun as the teasing and banter is though, Fuka's not purely focused on such things. Sharp-eyed and attentive to detail, some would say because she's so close to the ground, she spots what appears to be a trap of some kind. An explosive...? No, probably not. Bandits wouldn't use explosives, it'd just ruin the goods they were trying to capture. More likely some sort of gas trap, or something to keep the caravan in place by breaking wheels and/or legs.

    "I see it." She agrees in a low (for her) voice, moving up to the animals hauling the wagon. Naturally they're her first concern, as she moves to guide them to a careful stop. Before, that is, they travel to what appears to be the raised platform and tripwire. What happens after that, well, that all depends. Maybe someone will charge out and break the ambush, but she can't tell *where* the actual bandits are and where they'll come from. Maybe from beneath the covering itself! That'd be spicy!

"EeEeeEeeeee..." Uta blushes deeper, as she tilts away from Fuka, hands still buried in her touching knees. "This was not explained in the briefing! We don't really -have- to dance to allure them, do we?" She turns around as if looking around to friendly faces, Kaydon and Xander included, for confirmation.

Luckily, a distraction! Goldenblade comes up with technical combat question! A perfect opportunity to think about things that are not the things she doesn't want to think about!

"If they come at us with steel, we -magic blast- the steel! Simple as that!", Uta replies to Goldenblade. "And if they come at us with magic, we steel blast them. If they come at magic with steel, we us-blast them. Wait."

Uta frowns, and goes over her recent discussion, spinning her index finger clockwise and counterclockwise, as if winding and rewinding some imaginary tape in her brain. "...No, no, I think I went a little too far, there, can I have a do over?" Ahem. "If they come at magic with steel, we us-blast them- DANGIT!", she grimaces.

As a wise narrator once put it, 'Uta is-- being Uta. Doing uta things, because-- Uta!'

    Xander takes note that Golden and Fuka seem to have picked up on something, so when Goldenblade asks to check the wheel, the 'merchant' Salamander goes to assist, while making a hand sign to the guards to be ready. "You think some sand got in a bearing?" Keeping up the act.

Xander himself tries to spot what the other two have caught onto, but for him he isn't exactly seeing it. He then looks at Fuka and Uta regarding their outfits, he gives a shrug, keeping whatever thoughts he had to himself.

It is in this though that those 'panels' slowly open only enough to give shadow. Goldenblade would be the first to see it, given her already trained eyes, Fuka would be next.

        ================

    There is a 'THUMP' sound from all four panels, a few times actually. Darts were flying in toward the party members! They would have to act quick or face the doom of the raiders darts!

        ---- Roll Results ---

    Everyone thanks to Goldenblade and Fuka are ready for a possible trap or ambush. The only ones that go down are the two lander salamander guards as the darts hit the side of their neck and they actually go down to the ground asleep.

As for everyone else, they deflect, catch, or fully avoid the darts coming from the four panels.

It isn't shortly after the darts, do those traps throw open and at least four raiders come out. They are wearing steel and leather armor, with swords drawn and looking ready for a fight. One of them speaks up, "Hand us your coin, those two ladies, and your good, and we will let you live with your lives!"

Goldenblade smirks to Kaydon, who knows full well she knows nothing about wagon wheels. Fuka's reply draws a nod. She approves of Fuka's plan, "As long as you have that in your back pocket. Wherever you've got your back pocket stashed away." Uta's contingencies make Goldenblade sigh, too confused to even start to untangle that, and she says, "As far as I can tell, /none/ of that matters. Just hit them hard with a solid attack, and we'll wing it from there."

She manages to evade the dart coming her way, and when the raiders emerge, she will throw back the dustcloak she wears to draw both her swords. The golden steel of the blades she bears name her, but the badge she wears mark her as someone of consequence in the Westelande military also. Of course it's too late for the raiders to get out of this one. She laughs at their threat, and says, "I think I'll take my chances." Her chances include a savage attack on the closest bandit, which she also takes. Or perhaps leaves, as he's got it now.

One of the darts catches Kaydon in the chest. To one not paying attention, they would only see him get hit and drop to a knee. Really his armor absorbed the entirety of the dart, with it not hitting his flesh directly. But he'll play along with the raiders for now.

Really he's just waiting for the raiders to get within range, so that he can throw off his cloak, transform into his were fang gnoll form, and in one smooth motion lash out at the poor raider in range of the Jaeger gunblade.

    Aha! The classic covered ambush in the desert! Fuka saw that in... wait no, that's an entirely different genre of gaming. That was the one with all the cars and the water battles and the hunt for gasoline and everything. Not at all a place for a delicate flower like her.

    "Huh. Pretty smart ambush." Fuka notes, grinning. Take out the guards, then present demands to the merchants and passengers. She was actually struck by a dart, and her lacking her armour, but between silks and her having flooded her skin with earth mana, nothing penetrated. It also makes her somewhat browner-skinned than normal; perfectly in keeping with the desert theme. The ambush also locked them in combat mode, so there's no way they can chim out now or change into armour. They can access objects in their quick access menu however, and that includes manifesting a sheathed weapon!

    Fuka gestures, and Frank appears sheathed at her back. "Like, GREAT planning." she smirks. "But really really terrible threat assessment. Seriously dudes, do you even Analyze?" she asks, reaching back to draw the greatsword in a broad sweep, bringing it forward into a classic two-handed ready guard. "You can pry my coin from your cold dead hands!" she shouts. As a battlecry, it leaves something to be desired.

Uta is barely visivble as she ZIPS sideways. It seems to happen at the exact moment the dart hits. She's semi-literally just dodged a bullet there. She zips back immediately after, so fast that there's a sort of sonic bang associated with it -- and if people would have blinked, would have missed the double-dodging motion.

"What? No! I'm not loot!", shouts out Uta, all red in the face, in response to the bandits demands. Perhaps it's fury, or perhaps embarrassment, but it's certain that the bandits' words have struck a nerve, or more. "...And neither is my friend!", Uta hurries to add. "We are people, not items! Stop lootifying people!" Silence. "...lootifying... hmm... no, doesn't sound quite right."

A pause, as Uta listens to Fukaziroh's speech. "...good point, do we even Analyze?", Uta wonders, scratching her head. She activates her own inspection, to take a look at who she's against. Adventurers? Landers? What difficulty level?

Up to now, however, unless the bandits have explicity caught wind of her dodging earlier, she doesn't look much of a menace...

    "Oh I like that one," One of them says about Fuka. "She is spicy."

"Probably even juicy." Another states.

They even seem amused by Uta trying to justify that they are not items, to which one of the bandits says, "See, that is where you are wrong. You /are/ an item, one we could easily sell,to the right people." Uta's own analyzing skill will pick up that these guys are /low/ level landers. Like easy pickings.

    Though their mood changes when they realize that Goldenblade is fully armored, the same goes for Xander as he also shows off his gear. They then start to question their plans for attacking this group, as one of them speaks up, "Boys-- I think /we/ are the ones who just got ambushed."

"... shit... boss isn't going to like this." One of them grumbles out, as they all take a step back, seeming to become aware of their predicament growing. At least they seem to suddenly had a light bulb moment and back up again. "Screw it! We have other spots to get lucky!" One shouts out as the bandit---

Actually start to run for it?? Yes, they are running for it.

    DM Note: Feel free to attack the cowards or whatever.

    Fuka's going more by game tropism than actually Inspecting the bandits. That, and the relative ease the adventurers of the group had in both spotting the ambush and avoiding the opening salvo. She doesn't *know* they're weaker, but she assumes they are. And she's here to have some fun. At the bandits' expense, or possibly at Uta's. Both? Both is good.

    "Juicy? Spicy? Are you planning on fighting me or eating me?" Fuka asks saucily, brandishing her blade threateningly. "And quit objectifying my friend!" she shouts out, sounding rather more annoyed by that than by their comments about herself. "Can't you see she's a person, not an object? Soft, sultry and smooth, not merchandise at all!" she adds. "Besides you couldn't afford her!"

    Ah well, time to deal with the bandits after all. Fuka's not particularly murderous, but they DID attack first. With sleeping darts it seems, but it's still PVP action. Either that or they're a scripted encounter, or something. Well, lightning isn't deadly right? Right? Fuka swings Frank, channeling mana into the blade to shoot an arc of lightning out of the tip in the expectation that it'll taser the not-entirely-idiots who are running away for their lives. Hey, that's smart! And it's amusing, at least to Fuka!

Goldenblade ohs, "There's a boss?" asks Goldenblade, dashing after the retreating bandits. "Tell us where to find the boss, or you'll die here and now," she demands, and as a token of her seriousness, she hits one fellow so hard ... well, she hits him /really/ hard. He will be feeling that in the morning. She actually didn't mean to hit him -that- hard, and she watches his hit points slowly leak out.

Damn. She looks over to the other bandits, "Spill it," she demands, "Or you're next."

There's an old saying, you only need one guy left alive in order to spill the beans. So Kaydon figures he can kill two or three of them before they run into any issue. Which is why he launches at the one closest to him before the bandit can run.

The Jaeger flashes out with damascus steel singing through the air, an explosion of fire magic ripping through the blade in an explosion to add to the force of the strike. It could very well be enough to rip the bandit in half.

"FUUUUUUUUUKAAAAAAA!", Exclaims Uta, as the red in the face turns up a few shades. "I am not sultry!", she exclaims, as she jumps down from the cart, onto the sand of the desert. While she's reaching into her pouch, something Fuka said makes her choke and sputter again.

"And don't say that they cannot afford me!", she exclaims, even redder in the face, redness whose intensity skyrockets further (while the color spreads all over the rest of the body) as she, bug-eyed, looks around, frantic, and waves her arms. "NO! NO! I DIDN'T MEAN THAT AS IN 'YOU CAN ACTUALLY AFFORD ME! I MEANT- AGH! I'm not for sale!"

Tense like a wind-uperated toy car which has been connected to an electric drill, once released, she darts into the fray, so fast on can't even see her. With one syringe, likely unseen, ready to stab an unsuspecting bandit with anesthetic, likely the one who brought forth the demands. "How about we take you with us for a change?", she asks. "I cannot think of anyone who might want to purchase such shoddy merchandise, but I'm certain that we can find someone with low enough standars. A couple extra copper coins can always come in handy."

    One, two,
    three, four, five!
    Everyone going down to the adventure grind!

    But in all seriousness, three bandits are taken out with ease, while Uta goes after the one that remains, causing him to go unconscious before he could blather anything about anyone. Xander meanwhile is checking out their bunkers, which doesn't lead to much. Just some water jugs and a few pieces of jerky food.

Once the group does drag back the bandit, the two earlier knocked out guards are getting back to their feet. Xander looking over the group, then to Uta, "Load him in the wagon. We will take him back to a cell and we will question him." He glances over to Kaydon then the others. "I already investigated the areas below. They are just one, two person bunkers setup for exactly what they used them for."

The black scaled Salamander grins, "Good job everyone!"

With the bandits captured, she will go next to see if she can wake up our own Lander caravan guards, pausing to make sure the tranq darts aren't still in them. "C'mon, guys," she prods, and will give them a few hits from the oxygen bottle of they need it. "Time to get on with it." She prods them, shaking shoulders and the like. "Uta," she calls, "can you help?"

    "Of course you're not for sale." Fuka says innocently. Well, as innocently as one can possibly be while smirking so much that you probably deserve a slap for not being innocent. "That's exactly what I meant when I said they couldn't afford you!" she claims. All the while making it perfectly clear that no, that's not at all what she meant. But she's having fun at least!

    She pauses, considers. "Succulent then?" she asks. Soft, smooth and succulent? Got to get the alliteration in there somehow. "Sleek? Sexy? Seductive?" Fuka shrugs. "Pick an S-word. I've got my own S-word!" she says, brandishing Frank in triumph.

    Some day, Uta will learn not to encourage Fuka by blushing. Today is likely not that day.

Uta nods and salutes to Xander, "Roger that." The unconscious bandit is first slung over Uta's shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and after a quick rushed ride, dumped carelessly into the cart for later interrogation. "But I think we should teach him a lesson for what he did, but I cannot think of anything suitably devious yet," she comments, while she dusts her hands off.

Goldenblade's request is heeded, and she heads over to the Landers, to medically inspect them (and also perform menu-less manual medical examinations, for extra quality). The distraction and exercise proved fruitful, because the blushing has subsided enough for, well... you guessed it. Flare up again in a geyser of embarrassment. "FUKA! STOP THAT! I AM NONE OF THOSE THINGS!", Uta yells, looking up from her examination. Yes, the examination has to be interrupted because armflailing needs to take place. It is important. "That's my S-word. 'Stop that'. Hm, actually, that's technically two words...", Uta trails off, looking up, counting on her fingers, patients and Fuka forgotten. Because so works the attention span of the Uta.

But luckily, the medical instinct is strong in this one, and she quickly snaps out of her mental sidequest to return to take care of the Landers. "They're going to live," Uta reassures the party. "But we might want to take them to somewhere safe and quiet just in case..."

"Good to know. We'll get intel out of him, no doubt." Kaydon offers to take the guy off of Uta's shoulder if she wants, but otherwise he'll assist in making sure that the damn bandit gets locked up nice and safe.