Duty Session 617: The Show Must Go On

    It's a big night. The Marchioness is more focused then ever on the success of the production. Sure, she always wants things to go well, but now that Arcadia is a political reality, this is about making a good showing and proving that she is ready for this larger stage. Which is why she's here, at the coat check, ready to serve as security!

    It doesn't hurt that every ticket is money in the coffers and she has a LOT of things to pay for. But primarily, this is about art, entertainment, joy. To put it another way, it is not about the money! It is about a ^*!^ load of money!

    Before she can properly greet those who join her on this mission, an Imp named Resario appears. The Lander is, to put it lightly, agitated. But the appearance of Adventurers lights up his eyes. After all, they are good for everything! They slice, they dice, they julienne fries!

    "Monsieurs and mademoiselles!" he begins with a flourish of a bow, "Yours is an arrival most timely! A disaster has struck, and some key members of our production are missing! All hands are needed. Head backstage immediately!"

    He eyes the Marchioness a moment, as it to consider whether this is too much cheek, but being a man of the theater, he knows his business. Nobles love flattery! "Marchioness! How lovely! You were meant for the stage! Surely this is divine providence! A gift of the Goddesses is upon us!"

    All that aside, he appears ready to shovel the adventurers into action if he needs to. His anxiety is palpable.

Goldenblade has joined Wake for the opening night of her show, mostly to show willing, as her musical tastes don't stray far from Gilbert and Sullivan. She was talking with Wake, as they're longtime acquaintances, and her own Legendary status affords her a bit of slack frin the Landers. But it also means you get random job requests and here's one now.

"I'd be pleased to help," she says, with no idea what she's signing up for. Rats in the dressing room? Goblins backstage? Those sorts of problems are more her speed, but she will follow the Lander backstage to see what may be done about this.

Security. Okay, sure. Being the official bard of Wake's court and the composer of the nation's anthem Kauchemar just being there should be enough to help draw in the crowd, right? If she is to just stand around and look both awesome (always) and imposing (she is a were fang after all) so no one makes trouble, that's just a night off for her.

Of course it would see fate has a different idea, and just standing around turns out to be in the right place at the right time as things go abruptly wrong.

"Wow, I've heard of cursed opening nights, but we didn't even get to the traditional 'break a leg'." Not that it takes much to convince the bombastic equine to get on stage.

    There's always things to do, work and play and other things besides! The whole idea of a theatrical production is kind of awesome too, though admittedly Fuka prefers to take in her entertainment somewhat more actively. She's not the sort to, as it were, netflix and chill. Fuka has very little chill. But she's there because this is important to someone she cares for, and wants everything to go well.

    She blinks as the Imp makes his demand of her. "What, missing performers?" she asks, startled. "Of course I'll help find them! Backstage you say? ONWARD! EXCELSIOR!" and off she goes, muttering something under her breath about being needed in the back door. Perhaps best if no one asks for clarification.

So here Elf is there was song and while The person who she used to be would never think she could sing this well? She nows sings like a professional and she's come to live chasing a hobby this far. So how could you keep the Elf away? She clearly has dragged a few friends here to both lander and Adventure to watch what could go wrong. She was eager and excited to get into this as well the elf was vibrating also a chance to dress up fancy. She's in the backstge right now and is a prime target to be thrown into a role.

    Urged on by the impresario, the group finds their way backstage. They get there using an underground hallway and there are many turns. However, everything is orderly, and directions are clearly labelled. If anything, the activities of ushers, servers, and other staff members are the picture of poise.

    The sense of calm vanishes the moment the group enters the backstage area. As if on cue, a bottle of wine strikes the wall just to the right of the entry door.

    "Zis is an outrage! Zis.. is... entirely unacceptable!" screeches an attractive, young human woman in an ornate, red dress. "All zis time I have been ze understudy of ze understudy! Do you doubt me?"

    An inspection reveals this woman is Aria. As she bursts into song, her voice is like nails across a chalkboard. Only when the human Lander facing her covers her mouth is there peace. His name is Eugene. He is tall, athletic, and, according to the posters, serves as the director of this production. He's dressed in a neatly pressed white shirt and black pants.

    "Aria, we have been through this, my dear. You are not ready to take her place. Not even tonight!"

    Seeing the adventurers arrive, Eugene immediately shifts his focus (but he keeps Aria's mouth covered!) "And here are our substitutes! Wow, you /do/ make good time, don't you?" He turns back to the bristling Aria, "And see? We are going to be just fine. These adventurers... wow, they sent adventurers? That's remarkable! In any case, these good people will handle everything."

    Aria doesn't take it well. She tears away from Eugene, grabs the copies of the lyric sheet and script, and throws them into a burning brazier. "Good luck without zese!"

    Rather shocked at the suddenness of the trouble, Wake responds swiftly, blasting away at the brazier with water. "We need to stop zi... stop the fire!" she calls out urgently. Not that she manages to do so herself, mind you. She mostly just gets Aria wet. Which does not comfort the angry Lander one bit.

Kauchemar's ears promprly splay backwards. Not at the sound of shattering glass but the horrific cacophony that someone is trying to impose as singing. "Goddesses above, I've heard banshees with better tone, and they TRY to sound dissonance intentionally!" Which while entirely true, probably doesn't aid the situation any.

Especially when the spurned starlet throws a tantrum of bitch porpotions by throwing important papers into the fireplace. "You are not helping your case any." Aria? More like airhead. But Kauchemar is on the matter, summoning, of all things, one of the Cleaning Slimes to douse the fireplace in soapy bubbling slime. (Thanks Uta!)

Goldenblade can see where this is going, particularly with a group of Lander VIPs approaching. She slips into their path to cut them off, and begins shaking hands, introducing herself, and talking about the structure of Eas, the castle, and how the location is quite blessed in several respects. She winks for a moment to Wake, and will lead the VIP's through a tour of a place she has no idea about, but she's led people through barely framed buildings for 'familiarization' enough times, the BS just flies off her tongue. The secret is, it kind of doesn't matter. They won't remember anyway, and probably don't care now, but they're being talked to respectfully by someone apparently quite important, so this must be the right thing.

    Fuka comes backstage and looks on in surprise and wonder at the sausage being made. That is to say, the mayhem that occurs behind an otherwise seemingly straightforward presentation. And while Fuka has nothing against mayhem, or sausage for that matter, even she's a little freaked out by the chaos of the stage.

    "She did it." Fuka blurts out, pointing in Aria's direction as they approach the sounds of screaming and carrying on. "If you've got missing people, she did it. Calling it now, everyone." Fuka says, sighing. "And now we need to take care of ... business. SHOW business. Let's see..." she muses, looking cheerful in the face of adversity. As the group splits up to take care of things Fuka puts her energy and keen sylvan eyes, not to mention keen fashion sense, to work searching around for costumes that have survived the mayhem. Though she hasn't quite figured out WHO will be wearing them.

With the argument back stage going on her elvin ears are burning at thi they twitch a little bit. She looks Aira over for a moment and she pauses bowing.

She just stares for a moment.

The elf is now searching for costume and she's doing quite well in short order she's found a number of them intact which is the most imporant thing too right that they can be used!

    As the group scrambles to get ready and prevent disaster, Aria darted off, but not before she defends herself. Loudly. Shrilly. "I did nothink! I was wiz ze director all ze night! Every night!" Best not to ask.

    Anyway, through a mix of dumb luck (with some help from Eugene) and great skill, the team is more-or-less ready to perform, the VIPs are satisfied, and the roles have been chosen! As the team starts to review the script and the lyrics, there is a sound of things breaking coming from the direction of the stage. Accompanying it are Aria's angry screams.

Urged to stop whatever Aria is up to, the group goes to the stage. The backdrops are damaged! She's been throwing things and kicking and punching other bits of the scenery. What a mess! And she's already moved on. Who knows what Aria might do next!

The party can address this damage in several ways. They can move things back in place (physical), repaint the backdrops (artisany), replace the damaged scenery elements (earth), or enhance what exists to draw attention away from the damage (enchanting).

    As for Elly, she is going to focus on moving things back to their proper place. She has no great skill for enchanting nor visual arts. She can only hope that by getting the set back up that others can do more with it. Or maybe nobody will notice it too much? Here is hoping!

Goldenblade finds herself wrapped up in whatever dashing heroes wear here in Yamato, which at least it's not a doublet and hose. Having been costumed on her return to backstage after wishing the VIP's to enjoy the show, she returns to find more mayhem. Well, it's not hard to just pick up what's been knocked down, putting things back in place to help reduce the impact of the tirade. Wake would surely be mad if she hacked down the understudy even if it improved the girl's singing. Being dead couldn't possibly make it worse, but this isn't really the time for that discussion.

Kauchemar briefly pinches the bridge of her snout between two fingers. "It's women like that which give the rest of us attention seekers a bad reputation..." She is very much not impressed by Aria being more of a spoiled brat than a pageant show child. "But the show must go on."

Again she reachs into her summoner bag of tricks with another call for aid. Which is answered by what could be mistaken as the sound of a stampede... but proves to just be a pack of her Rock Moles. Who charge through like a band of roadies carrying a couple of large rocks and random plants to prop up and replace scenery pieces. With literal scenery. Nothing like a random touch of authenticity!

Meanwhile with her monsters doing most of the work Kauchemar pulls out some of the salvaged papers and shuffles through them. Let's see what she's got to work with...

Spoiled Starlets, well this starlet is basically bringing an end to her job as an performing with this stunt. Elf is now swiftly getting to work. She puts props and set pices back into place. She's a lot stronger than she looks the wonder of digital reality but she does feel it as she gets things into place. Shen done the elf makes a face now as she gets the last bit back into palce. With whatever Aira is doing the show's got to go on right? She starts to get an idea because there is someone who needs more spotlight for what he does for the world...

    "With the director all night, every night?" Fuka says, eyes narrowing. Then she shrugs. "I guess that's one way to get the role huh? Huh?" she grins.

    Aria is, it seems, not just a hot mess. She's also a would-be diva, at least in temperament if not talent, and nothing but trouble. Well okay, this shouldn't be too bad. Pursing her lips, Fuka examines the damage. "Doubt we'll be able to fix this, or repaint, not ourselves. But I've figured out a few ways to, shall we say, draw the eye?" she says roguishly. "And by that I mean distractions. Give someone something to stare at so they're not noticing the rest of things. Let's see. A bit of paint... a little mana..." she makes a few strokes, layering abstract symbols onto the back side of the props. Enough to draw attention, much as one of her relics does. Easy stuff when you're a supergenius! Or at least Fuka.

    Aria's location is uncertain, but the time for the performance has come! Sadly, the lyrics and script are damaged and there was little to no time to make use of them. The party will have to rely on whispers and gestures from Eugene, make their best guess, and IMPROVISE throughout the musical. When words are missing, they will be indicated as <place>, <person>, etc. But often, whole sections are missing entirely. The performers will have to fill in the gaps as best they can!

    In the first part of the play, the dashing hero first sees the fair damsel at <place>. Judging by the hero's expression, their confidante explains who it is the hero is looking at. The confidante's response was damaged, though! The name of the damsel, her rank, her father's name, and reputation, must all be made up on the spot! Good luck, confidante! It'd be amazing if you could make a rhyme of that.

    The hero is to make a strong impression on the damsel, but how that is done is missing. It's unclear if it should be funny or romantic! Eugene gives a thumbs up and is sure you will think of something! The lyrics included the words 'as smooth as silk' and appear to have rhymed that with milk. Well, that is a start!

    As for the damsel, she has a response, unfortunately it is only clear that she curtseys and shows her... something. Ugh. That's not terribly specific, is it? And the script indicates something about... birds and her shoulder. The director has every confidence you will make this memorable!

    Those not playing a key role can support the action in a variety of ways. Perhaps what this musical really needs are memorable special effects? Or the main cast needs some suggestions or the sudden introduction of an entirely new character! The set is also a bit dangerous. Supporting cast may have to act just to keep the main players in one piece (and wind up on the stage in the process)!

Goldenblade is, wait, the hero in this? OK. Her list of plays is kind of short, and she always gets Romeo and Juliet mixed up with West Side Story. But she'll wing it.

She turns to look at Wake, and claims, "Oh hark, what light through yonder .. er.. clearing comes. Alas, it is the east." What's the next line? Oh wait, the partner's got that line, so it's not on her.

She will simply gaze dramatically at Wake, mugging mightily. To make a strong impression, though, she will grab Wake by one hand and around the waist, and Charleston her across the scene. She was quite a smooth Charlestoner, back in the day, but that day was 1953, and Wake would be excused for not being quite as smooth as Goldenblade at the dancing. Smooth as silk, sure, but she's not sure about where the milk comes in, and is looking around for a bottle.

    Fuka is ... a wicked friend who is supposed to notice the hero lusting after the noble maiden and help her out? SCORE! The little Sylph is all in for this!

    Admittedly she's more of an overactor than actress, but she's good at song and verse and being silly-romantic. So accompanying Goldenblade onto the stage, she takes exaggerated notice of Goldenblade's 'notice' of Elly. And ... well okay this is amazing, but Fuka just grins and hams up an improvised sonnet.

    "Oh gentle suitor, come and hear my verse. For I shall speak of the noble maiden fair. Whose beauty doth the heart and soul immerse, and in whose presence one must stop and stare."

    "A noble maiden is a wondrous sight. Her grace and charm a treasure to behold. Her voice a song, her eyes like stars at night. Her manners polished, her heart of pure gold."

    "She walks with poise, and dresses like a queen. Her beauty shines like sunshine on a hill. Her words are kind, and her heart is serene. Her laughter a balm, that can heal and still."

    "But know that she is not a prize to win. Her heart must be wooed with true love within." Fuka finishes. Then, suddenly grinning widely, she stage-whispers, "Or, you know, with a really big sword. Some damsels go for that. Go with what you got, I say!"

    Elly is pretty sure that was not in the script. But then again, she only saw the script for around two minutes. She knows she has to curtsey, which she only just manages before Goldenblade grabs her and pulls her into the dance. Eugene's encouraging gestures and mouthing of words is remarkably unhelpful. The Marchioness at least can trust her poise and grace to carry her through. Dancing? Yes, she can dance!

    But.. birds. Something about birds. Eugene, off stage, releases some birds, which (unbeknownst to him) have been agitated by a furious understudy of... an understudy. Is that a thing? Instead of gently alighting on the damsel, they dive bomb her! She's going to need some help.

    After Fuka's delivery, she has to deliver a line or two of her own. Oh lord.

    "Mighty hero, bold and fearless, though my father forbids it, your dancing is peerless!"

    Yeah, that's... horrible, but she is on a roll!

    "Your steps they make my heart race," and here Elly has to duck away from a diving crow, "Take me away to a more private place."

And there they go the play is in full swing now and she's got a stupid old grin on her face she now thinks for a moment to help woth this some speical effects, right? She's now keeping off stage, she's making ready to let lose with the wind just at the right moment. She will time the wind spells perfectly adding to the drama as she gets a stage hand to go find something special for her...oh she has an idea to make this play amazing! This is what happens when the ELF IS LEFT UNATTENDED!

It may surprise some present that Kauchemar doesn't just barreled onto the stage herself, despite how much she's feeling this production needing to be 'saved'. But all the tantrum throwing has made her feel a little less... bombastic than usual. This wasn't her show, and there was no reason for her to upstage anyone. At least not intentionally.

Instead, she stays off stage, but rubs her hands together with a sort of chaotic glee of her own. She's got one of her new tricks and this is the perfect oppritunity to show it off even if its from the sidelines. She's waiting, letting the other cast members make their lines, and Eugene to hit the cue for releasing doves to try and signify the attraction between the Hero and the Damsel.

Which goes off the rails as the doves instead want to recreate a scene from The Birds. Now some birds need killing and she's got something even better than one stone.

Kauchemar snaps her fingers, making a small swirl of fire appear. Which she grabs in said fingers again and flicks out into an arc over the stage. Where it detonates. Repeatly, causing a series of rythmic and colorful bursts of fireworks (that may or may not take care of some of those wayward birds). They say when two heart fall in love sparks fly! There's your sparks, in full pyrotechnic glory!

    After the first meeting, the damsel and the hero met on several occasions. The script indicates romance, but the hasty review made it unclear beyond that. Regardless, this romantic (or not) start has led the group to the duel! Whispers from Eugene indicate it is a dramatic fight which brings the first act to a pulse-pounding ending.

    This takes place in a dark, empty <place> where the party was discussing what to do about the forbidden romance. It appears that the damsel must explain why her father will not approve, but all that the script has to offer here is a smudged sentence and a hasty whisper from Eugene. It's hard to be sure what he said, but apparently the source of the trouble is an old... something with an oo sound and maybe ending in a d sound? Maybe brood? Zoo? Dude? Crude? The damsel is clever, they'll figure it out!

    After this explanation, Eugene leaps onto the set and draws his prop sword. Eugene challenges... someone to a duel. It's vague. He's leaving it up to the confidante and the hero to figure it out! Or maybe an extra will leap in! Whoever it is, they face an inspired Eugene, who is here to battle for the hand of the damsel.

    The confidante urges the hero to do something with the damsel. Eugene is far too into his role to give further instructions though! The confidante will have to figure that out somehow. They might remember something about throwing the damsel over something and running away.

Based on the confidante's urgings (or not!) the hero must act in a suitably dashing way. Fight? Flee? Engage in witty repartee? Who knows.

    As for the extras, there is certainly a need for a weapon or armor for the duel. The props aren't always the safest, so it may even be necessary to ensure that no debris hits the audience when the duel heats up!

    With this setup, Elly has her work cutout for her. She has, over the past scenes, been a loyal (if admittedly very randy) damsel, indeed. Pure of heart went out the window along the way. The crowd, for their part, is roaring with laughter over this most unique version of the musical.

    And so it is that the group gathers in a most meta location. An empty stage in an abandoned theater, to discuss their plans.

    With a most dramatic pose, the back of her right hand raised to her forehead, Elly cries out in aguish. Her volume is increased somewhat to cover Aria throwing a boot across the stage. Eugene has to briefly wrestle with her until the young woman runs away with a shriek.

    "We must address my father's wrath,
    and shake him from his vengeful path
    Long ago he was so wronged
    Your uncle pushed him in the pond."

    She has a pause. What the heck rhymes with.. what is Eugene saying? It makes no sense! Zoo? What about a zoo? How can she get that to work. She needs a different word...

    "So my love, now you see,
    The sad fate that's awaiting me
    If we cannot end this feud
    All caused by the slip of a clumsy... dude?"

    Elly would cringe, but the audience keeps laughing and laughing. They are eating it up! Probably. It can be hard to tell if they are laughing with her or at her. Her dramatic posing and attempts to represent the accident looked rather less convincing, though, that much is obvious!

    Okay, Fuka has absolutely no clue what's supposed to happen with this performance. That doesn't matter though, she's happy to improvise! The script calls for her to do something to support the hero getting together with the maiden, and that sings in her heart.

    "Oh valiant hero, with heart so true and bold. Thou seeketh to claim fair damsel fair. Yet, lo! Her suitor hath thee caught and cold, And preventeth thy love from being declared."

    "But hark! A plan to grant thy heart's desire. Whilst I, thy loyal friend, distract the suitor. Abscond with her, my friend, light as a feather, And let not his jealousy make thee a looter."

    "For wuv, sweet wuv, is worth the risk we take, And fate shall favor those who dare to seize. So take her hand and make thy bold escape, And leave this battlefield with utmost ease."

    "Go forth, dear hero, and claim thy heart's prize, Whilst I, with sword in hand, engage in wise."

    So saying, Fuka takes up her greatsword. She doesn't light it up though. That would be ... well, that would be more than merely excessive. Between the birds, the explosions and other matters, there's enough chaos. Adding lightning would just overshadow the others' efforts, and probably kill the poor actor besides. Fuka instead does her best to duel him in a manner that doesn't result in either of them dying. Of course if he happens to stab her, fine. He's using a stage prop. Probably. Fuka, on the other hand, isn't. Hopefully she can at least make the showing good!

Goldenblade's horrible dancing leads into a horrible song that seems to follow the music. If you're not listening to the music very closely. And then a bunch of other things happen, and the plot is getting kind of hard to follow.

But, so there's a fight scene coming up, and all this prop weaponry, most of which is in bad repair after the understudy to the understudy started sabotaging things, but Goldenblade can quickly put it to rights, and begins to do so, but Eugene wants to fight, and now.

She can do that, too, fighting with one hand while she holds an awl in her mouth, and works the yuck out of the prop daggers with her free hand. It's a bit complicated, but she's being heroic, right?

No, no, Fuka is here and cueing her to go to Wake! OK....

She gives Eugene a shove back, and will head over to Wake, put on her cheesiest grin, and throw her across her shoulders in a fireman's carry, and jitterbug offstage, stage right, as Wake soliloquoys from her shoulder.

Kauchemar had managed to save a few bits of the script from the fire.... but by this point she just tosses them over her shoulder to scatter off stage. What's the point when this show has become a glorious spectacle of disaster.

But the scene was set in a dark location, and that gives her something to improvise with. The shadows she loves engulfs her and Kauchemar bolts onto the stage, faintly visible. But rather than get directly involved she scoops up the dropped sword, and with a graceful sweep flicks it into the air, spins around, and grabs Eugene's arm to jerk out and grab the prop. Which works, but then the force of her pull causes him to stumble as he snatchs at it.

So Kauchemar plants a hoof, lets go and grabs his opposite arm then pivots, swinging the man around her to make it look like he's making a wide slash... which admittable isn't the type of sword fighting he had been intending, but it is what it is. Then he's brought back around and given an elaborate spin and twirl, then released as Kauchemar slips back off stage.

Except all the spinning and fake slashing has got Eugene a bit wrapped up in the cloak he'd been wearing for DRAMATIC EFFECT, and facing the opposite direction as the rest of the cast.

Fuka's attempt at overethusiastic realism might end up stabbing him in the ass now. Literally.

Erufu had the idea that the weapons needed to be inspected, oh my they needed to check the weapon she starts going over them concerned over. Some are so bad they should be ready to be smelted down. She will try to inspect them while she is a trained crafter in this? She does not run a shop or anything like that so she's going to miss things, sadly she very much misses thing. She ends up having to take the hit from a splinted sword which thankfully everyone thinks is a part of the show, she's going to be feeling that one for a while but one must suffer for their art.

    The break in the action has given the director time to share a bit more information about the second act. And to get his posterior bandaged. He's totally excited to be stabbed by a real adventurer, though! Unfortunately, the duel also led to him twisting his ankle. Aria is there to take care of him! This is great! Eugene is talented and the unpredictable actress is kept busy. Unfortunately, the creative, uh, deviations from the earlier sections of the plot are going to require some adaptation. But fear not! The second act provides a soft beginning.

It starts <some period of time> later. The damsel and hero have run away and are living in secrecy in a cottage in a <Forest? Swamp? Cave? It could be anything!> Wherever it is, the hero has arranged for a romantic moment. Aria encourages the hero to really play up the romantic side of things. "Zis is ze most important part! Zis is where you win zere heart!" There are many props that can be used, and the damaged set pieces make it easy to pass off the location in a variety of ways. What is clear is that a balcony is available and that is where the damsel will be found.

The damsel is on the balcony, worrying over things and is reluctant to engage in further romance. All this hiding seems wrong to them. The damsel must work hard to sell this to the audience! They must seem conflicted! Or was that another word? Well, whatever way the damsel goes, Eugene and Aria are both confident it will go well.

Meanwhile, the confidante meets someone (hero or damsel) to convince them of something. This part of the script was ruined and they're going to have to wing it. Maybe they are trying to get the damsel to meet the hero. Maybe they are trying to get the hero to confront the issues with the damsel's father. Perhaps they are trying to offer someone free real estate?

Extras can contribute by dealing with mood lighting or playing the father who has come to meet the hero. Or continue playing a role they invented previously! The director encourages any extras to tap into the moment, to make their mark, and use their special skills.

    There is a break from song, thankfully. But not a break from speaking. Elly has to convey the setting to the audience and convince them that the mess that was act one somehow made sense.

    "Oh, noble hero! Please hear my plea. We have spent forty-five minutes running from our past, but we cannot forever wait in this ruined castle! We must go back to our lives, to our families, and not tear our homes apart!"

    In her defense, Elly is really selling her terrible improvisation and has fully embraced farce. Many in the audience might even be convinced to say it is not horrible, but intentional. Hopefully they all hit the wine hard during the intermission.

    "This love is forbidden, my sweet, and though my loi.. my heart burns with aching need for your swor.. touch, I must sacrifice myself to prevent further bloodshed! This fiery longing can no longer be heeded! My sweet, I can no longer offer you my, uhh, hand?"

    Okay, she has to keep this a comedic presentation. Making this back into a proper drama is beyond the abilities of a Legend.

    Fuka's not at all sure what the point of this performance is, but everyone seems to be having fun. Even the guy she just kind of accidentally stabbed while duelling overly enthusiastically. It was quite realistic in fact. The spray of blood, or at least pixels, was something she didn't realize they had a prop for! Eugene doesn't seem upset however, so it's all good. Hopefully he gets patched up as the scene transitions.

    More timely and perplexing, Fuka considers what the script calls for her to do. Convince *someone* of *something*, but who? Fuka decides she's done enough encouraging of Goldenblade for a time, and leaves his side early in the scene with a comment of "Relax, I'm your wing girl." - including a gesture taking in her actual wings, which ought to amuse the audience even if many of them don't understand the euphamism.

    It's only a few steps to Elly's side, but that involves going 'inside' the house prop and to the balcony. Before Goldenblade can bring the charm, Fuka does her own thing to encourage 'Maiden' Elly to follow her heart.

    "Oh fair damsel, with beauty so divine. Whose heart doth yearn for love's sweet embrace. Hear me, I pray, and let thy heart incline. To follow where true love doth set its pace."

    "Thy suitor, he who seeks to hold thy heart, Hath not the fire that burns within thy breast. Nor doth he know thy soul's most precious part. And thus with love thou shalt never be truly blest."

    "But my dear friend, the hero who doth love, He doth possess a heart that beats with thine. And in his arms, thou shalt feel like a dove. Whose wings doth soar, above the clouds so fine."

    "So you both should flee, and leave behind the strife, To find a love that shall last for all of life!"

    Fuka pauses her recitation, then turns to make a dramatic exit so the confession and what have you can take effect. But on the way to exit stage right, she adds, "Besides, he has an AMAZINGLY mighty sword. Long and hard. Thou doth not dare give that a miss! I beg of you, give it... give him a kiss!"

Goldenblade opens the next act in ... a grass hut in Ethiopia or someplace, she's not exactly clear. Why they're here, she's not clear on, and now they want her to go back. "Uh, okay. So why did we come here in the first place?" she blurts out, forgetting she's the hero for a moment and was probably important to dragging people out here in the first place, nodding as Fuka says to rely on her. "But anyhow," she turns back to Wake, "baby, that's not important. What's important is that you can see how sincere I am. By dragging you all the way out to Bee Eff Eee, I have shown my Sin-cer-it-teee."

She knows how Balconies go, she's seen Romeo and Juliet, though watching Japanese do Shakespeare is always a bit weird.

Riffing off Wake, she says, "Er," because she caught the end of Fuka's suggestion. She has no idea how to rhyme or improvise lines, and she's realizing she may be playing the straight man to Fuka, so she just says, "It's a hundred miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, and half a pack of cigarettes. It's dark and we're wearing sunglasses." That just felt right here. She will do whatever Wake says here.

Ruined castle. Good cover on the haphazard scenery Wake, bravo. But more importantly, it gives Kauchemar more to work with to sell this.. well, now it's a parody, but we can go with that. She calls back her Rock Moles, gives them some of the prop armor and weapons (not made of metal thankfully so they won't try to eat them), and then pulls her staff off her back and powers it up with Darkness magic. Takes a few steps back, and points it like a projector towards her monsters.

But none of that is seen out on stage. All they get is the heavy wump wump wump of reverb from the Grindcore Staff, replicating the sound of marching footsteps and armor thumping. Shadows flicker across various pieces of scenery, cast by her staff's magic using the costumed Rock Moles, to give the appearance of soldiers on the move, searching the ruins. On no! The angry father has sent his men to find his missing daughter and the scoundrel that absconded with her! How terrible! How imposingly dramatic! Such tension, such emotion!

... which is promptly ruined as the lead 'soldier' stops, leading the other two shadows to bump into him. These leads into the first turning around smacking the second with his sword, but then trying to smack the third only to have the sword bounce off his shield and smack himself in the head from the recoil.

The Three Stooges would be proud.

From there it only devolves into a complete free-for-all, and all three come tumbling across the stage in a Big Ball of Cartoon Violence, thanks in part to Kauchemar casting a dark cloud of shadows over the brawling moles until they topple off the other end of the stage.

    Elly, now having been um, encouraged to make a loving(?) decision and satisfy her hear.. well part of her anatomy, anyway, must respond appropriately. She moves incredibly close to the hero and looks into Goldenblade's eyes with longing. And tries so hard not to laugh. And hopes that her breath is okay. The audience is at the edge of their seats. Are they... going to /kiss/?!

    They do not kiss. Cause Tae is understanding, but the awkwardness would be with them forever. Instead, Elly puts her arms around the hero and says, in a sultry, deeper voice.

    "Hit it."

Erufu is watching behind the scenes at this point she's been falling into strage hand things at this point still if that roadie can find that armor for now it comes for effects she will give them effects? She wouild bring in crawling darkness which oozes up out of the stage. It will curl about people legs and otherwise in the dark but it will not harm anyone though the elf may be going overboard with this as several shadowy Goblins will appear here and there in the monster groups...okay a lot more shadow made goblins!

    The team has made it. The audience has had a strong reaction to things thus far. Positive or negative is not always clear, but they want more. Eugene urges the group to offer an amazing finish to the, uh, story they have crafted together. They need a curtain call!

    Not just any curtain call is required for this performance. This demands a bonus song! This may take some writing, some singing, and probably some projectiles, too. And light. Definitely could use some lighting for the moment!

    Somehow the damsel and hero ended up together, the damsel's father has recognized their union, and their eldest child is (like their parents) involved in a forbidden romance! At least that is what Eugene hastily recommends for the outline of the song. The confidante can remind the damsel and hero that they, too, were a forbidden romance.

    Aria adds quickly, "Ze lyrics, zey don't matter much. Just focus on one or two good lines each! It will be tres magnifique!" At least she isn't throwing things anymore!

    All that is to say, the cast is on their own to patch a couple lines together each. Thankfully the follow-up scenes to the romantic moment have gotten them to this place, and Eugene has given just enough hasty direction to give Elly a starting point. But it has to be.. horrible, or it will ruin the entire tone of the farcical romance.

    "And now my friends, we see at last,
    With our daughter, repeats the past
    She's broke our poor hearts and fled afar
    To marry some drunk who runs a bar
    Of ill repute and shameful custom
    I'd like my lover to go and bust 'im."

    Of course, in this moment, lighting is everything. Big, bold, bright! And so Elly spotlights as she delivers her lyrics, and readies to keep others in a good light as they perform. Whatever the audience makes of this night's performance, it's going to be burned into their memory for years to come!

Goldenblade goes up to our erstwhile daugher, and now as parent and child, she says, "I hope your trials in love shoot as straight and true as this magic bow," which, as it turns out, doesn't shoot straight or true at all, and someone offstage is swearing hard as GB tries now to hide the bow behind her back as she sings,

Old GB, one day,
Was shootin' at some food
And up from the ground
Come a bubblin' crude.

And now she thinks about it, maybe that's not the best conclusion song after all.

And as they guide this train wreck of a production to it's grand finale, it's when the.. well now it's the Nightmare Bard of Arcadia finally struts onto stage herself. Both because it's a musical number, and because it is a theater tradition for even the stage hands and support crew to come out for the final curtain calls. She's got her staff held in one hand like a mic stand to use it's amplifying effect, as with the other she gives a big grandous wave towards the others that were actually performing on stage. She may be somewhat famous but clearly she's putting the attention on those that actually acted through all that craziness.

" o/~ The family black sheep and the ugly duckling, have earn true love and family trusting
Doesn't matter if it's wrong or right, you were bound for a show since you sat down tonight
That's why Kauchemar is singing this part of the song, to farther convince you to just go along
Romantic comedy of errors still hits all the beats, your applause is the only treasure we seek o/~ "

    As the hero and damsel make their love known, Fuka is grinning like a loon, particularly as she knows what the real situation is between these two. That is to say, just how unlikely their 'love' would actually be. But the story, it comes to a close... with a twist! And Fuka decides that, to make the twist even better, she must reprise her role as the enabler of romance.

    "Oh child fair, born of love's sweet delight. Whose eyes doth sparkle like the morning dew. Hear me, and let my words bring forth insight. To show thee what true love shall make thee do."

    "Thy father, hero brave, didst take a chance, To abscond with thy mother in their youth, And love didst conquer all, with its true romance, And brought them joy and peace, in love's sweet truth."

    "But I, dear child, didst do a deed most dire. And once didst lead thy father's love astray. And now, my guilt doth set my heart on fire. As I advise thee now, on love's sweet way."

    "So take thy love, and let thy heart be free. For love shall guide thee, to thy destiny." Fuka ends with a bow, and a broad wink in Goldenblade's direction, followed by a hammy nudge-nudge gesture, then exeunt stage right before anyone can catch her and make her pay for the implication of the words.

Erufu has known kau for a long time, heck she even helped her become more versed in song. So she goes to hell with it the elf is going to run out on stage with a big old grin on her face. She's at least in costume somehow and she's going to et in and sing along side Kaurhemar shocking in perfect hamonry with her as she too sings.

"o/~ The family black sheep and the ugly duckling, have earn true love and family trusting
Doesn't matter if it's wrong or right, you were bound for a show since you sat down tonight
That's why Kauchemar is singing this part of the song, to farther convince you to just go along
Romantic comedy of errors still hits all the beats, your applause is the only treasure we seek o/~!"

    Once the song is concluded, the crowd erupts with applause and laughter. It seems that Landers and Adventurers alike approve of the performance! No doubt it will be on tongues for many, many days to come! The adventurers have performed and delivered something hilarious!

    Eugene is thrilled with the results and showers the adventurers with compliments. Moments later the Imp Resario (remember him?) joins him.

    "That was splendid! You have delivered a crescendo for our production! From the jaws of defeat you have snatched victory! Thank you! Thank you!"

    He bows to every one of the cast, then races off to go flatter the various VIPs.

    Elly sighs in relief, turning to the other adventurers. "Thank you all for pulling this off! If we had bombed tonight, I fear it would have left a stain on the theater!"

    "What, NO I'D NEVER BOMB THE THEATER!" Fuka insists, rather unconvincingly. Of course she's still grinning. "Besides it was fun. A shame I didn't get the lovely maiden. Or one of the lovely maidens, but the two of you were a cute couple! Even if you didn't actually kiss!"

Goldenblade looks honestly surprised that we got a good reaction, but says, "I'm pleased to hear it. I'm afraid I had to wing a lot of it. There might not be any way to recapture what we did out there." Which may be for the best. But she will shake hands all around, snorting at Fuka's mention of kissing. "What is it with you and kissing. Did you not get kissed enough as a child?"

    Elly laughs and turns to Goldenblade, pretending to contemplate the suggestion. Even with her control of etiquette she is giggling and shaking her head quickly. "No, no, that... is not something we will be doing, Fuka."

    A voice startles the Marchioness a moment later. "You really should have gone for it!" A moment later, Tae enters stage right and strolls up to her wife. "More seriously, though, that was /amazing/! I haven't laughed that hard in years!"

    She grins at Goldenblade, "You were great! Though I have to admit, I am not familiar with some of the references. But thanks to Elly, I know about the Blues Brothers. I had to explain to half a dozen Landers what Chicago is. And what a tank of gas is."

    "It was a unique performance for sure!" Fuka agrees. "And hey! I'm a soft-hearted romantic! Just because you have all the passion of a dead frog doesn't mean the rest of us should avoid a little hot action, or at least a hot imagination!" she ripostes. Then looking at Tae, Fuka grins broadly. "Now here's someone who can show us how it's really done!!!"

Kauchemar lets out a satisfied sigh as she leans on her staff. "Well, that was definitely not the kind of show anyone here has seen before. Good job."

    Elly knows that her wife needs little incentive to show her affections. Tae is a performer and has been since she was young. Fuka's encouragement is just too much fun.

    "Well, if you want a demonstration, how can I refuse?" Tae asks playfully.

    She is much shorter than Elly, but she's also got the Marchioness wrapped around her finger. So a smile, eye contact, and a tilt of her head is all it takes to get what she wants. And they do kiss. Thoroughly. Not quite to the extent of 'get a room already', but so close that it makes little difference.

    Tae giggles a the end of the kiss, then takes her wife by the hand. "Thank you all and have a wonderful night! I'm afraid I must steal your damsel from you. Fear not though, the needs of her... heart will be satisfied."

    And then, shamelessly, the pair make their way back home again. They don't even pause to talk to anyone on the way!

Erufu is nbow taking any bows she was suposed to, and will shuffle off stage, the point is the audiance enjoyed it. Though the look Guild Girl gave her from the crowd was priceless as the seeming wonder Cowgirl had. She seem pretty pleased it went better than a highschool play that...only her Sister and Grandfather would know about...Wait They do know and they are in Yamato...interal paniced elf noises.