Duty Session 624: Minecart Goblin Edition

    Where there are caverns and tunnels, there are goblins. It's a truism many adventurers seem to take for granted. Or for granite. Sometimes they try to have a sense of humour about it.

    "So, that's the mine entrance up ahead," Miyako says to the group that's joined her on this little expedition. "This mine used to produce fairly useful amounts of metals, and the Landers would like to be able to access that again. Only, the goblins seem to be insisting on having a vote in the matter, and they're being annoying about it. So we've been asked to ... dissuade them."

    The cave itself is unremarkable for those who are familiar with mine entrances, an opening in face of the hill framed by heavy timbers. A couple of basic wooden shacks nearby house the miners' equipment, locked and protected by sealing spells until the miners are able to return to work.

    A small squad of Lander guards is there, as well, mostly to keep any nosy would-be heroes out of the mine - and the equipment shacks. "You the lot we were told to expect?" the Gnome leading them asks, and Miyako nods.

    "Aye," the Spriggan answers. "Master Gwillian said you're having goblin trouble."

Goblins, you can't live with them and you can't live without them.

Especially when they're causing problems for those seeking precious resources.

So it's up to brave adventurers to assist.

And where there's Miyako there's Kotono!

The spry young Spriggan can be seen leaping from perch to perch and rolling briefly as she hits the ground before literally dashing up alongside Miyako. Once she gets there, she stands silently, letting Miyako do the talking before she speaks. "We're here to help out and take care of those goblins!"

Goldenblade has not so much bustled over when she heard the word going out for this quest, but she broke herself away feom several projects she's been guiding simultaneously. As Olympus's main builder, with them in a building mode, times are busy. But goblin mines promise all sorts of mineral wonders, or so she's imagined, and she's willing to see how much truth there is to that. Arriving in mail coat and pack, with a sword at each hip and her hair tied back, she seems ready and eager to see what may happen.

She nods to Miyako as we arrive at the mine entrance, taking a look around. No goblins out here, but there wouldn't be, would there? "We're here to kill goblins and chew bubblegum," she says, "and no one's invented bubblegum yet." That's a declaration of intent if there ever was one.

And when you're going hunting in caverns you do best to have a Hunter with you that is familiar with navigating such subterrain. Maybe not as much as forests and mountains, but Shiruba does have a strong attunement with the Earth in general. And since they're going underground she opted to bring her Bun-Bun instead of her usual falcon. Windburn does not do well with interiors, especially ones that might be too constraining for her to fly properly. So instead there is a bun sitting contently on the wolfgirl's head, easily mistaken for an odd fuzzy hat unless he twitches his whiskers or flicks an ear.

She blinks at Goldenblade. "I'm not so sure what those two things have to do with each other, but the sentiment is certainly there."

Gwen is here and she's glad in her Mystic Knight outfit, she knows goblins need to be purged. SO here she is and ready to help out. The towering woman seems to be in a good mood as she spys Miykako and Kotono along with Goldenblade.

"Good to see you all here we should be doing pretty good and that is very true Goldenblade.

It seems Morri has either found and force Gwen into whatever she cooked up or forgotton about it as she follows up her sister.

"We're going to kick Goblin ass that's what!"

It's important to regularly cull goblin populations. Letting them sit around and fester is asking for a nightmarish underground labyrinth full of filth-stained traps and spikes and knives to open up somewhere inconvenient. Not that normal goblin populations don't have those, but when they're coordinated it gets so much worse.

The Doctor of Tolbana has a bit of a grudge, in case it wasn't clear. Which probably explains why he's here.

"Fortunately, we have some experience slaying goblins," Prophylaxis rejoins with a pleasant smile. "Please leave the job to us. We'll take care of it."

    The guard nods, relaxing gratefully. "Good to know someone's going to clear those nuisances out," he says, "My boys want to be cracking rock, not heads."

    '... bubblegum?' he mouths to himself, then dismisses it as yet another weird adventurer thing.

    Miyako nods and smiles lightly. "Don't worry, we'll take care of it."

    The guard-gnome grunts. "Aye, well. We won't hold ye back from it. There's a map posted inside, with the locations we'd spotted them at marked on it. A little luck and you'll find them before they find you."

    Indeed, the map is available as described, complete with a dozen hand-drawn copies the mine foreman had made for the adventurers. The marked locations, however, are quite deep in the mine.

    "What say we take some of these carts?" Miyako suggests. "We can pole along, like a swamp-boat."

    It's not a bad decision, but it might not be the wisest. The track swiftly grows steeper as the party goes along. Eventually the carts are going at quite a clip! And then there's a big open chamber, complete with a wide fissure splitting it in half... a the bridge across it is... *not* intact. Whoops.

    "Well, that's no good," Miyako mutters. "We're gonna need an extra push!"

Goldenblade nods to Proph about goblins. She hasn't got his grudge, but she thinks of them as cockroaches without their redeeming qualities. Shiruba gets a sigh and a half-hearted 'Kids today,' mutter. The Lander, she didn't expect would get it. It's all memes and no one knows the old cliches anymore. It's not even /that/ old, or she seems to recall it in a recent movie ... from 30 years ago. Maybe not that recent.

She follows along into the mine, getting into a cart, and hrms as the track goes deeper. When we get to the downslope, with what she can see ahead, it's time to apply the brakes. Hard. She pushes the cart back up to the top, gets out an oil can, and lubes up all four rusty wheels. Not until they all spin freely does she seem satisfied, and she gets back in. "We ought to be able to make it," she says. "If we're going forward ... with the upangle from ..." She doesn't have the math, but it /looks/ right. And she's had 50 years of eyeballing basic physics.

She gets going down the slope, the lubed up wheels turning nicely, and she ducks inside the cart to eliminate air resistance. She's flying as she gets to the bottom of the slope, and zings up the broken tracks, flying across the chasm, and landing hard on the tracks on the other side hard enough to jar her teeth. The cart misses the tracks and spills her out to the side, but she picks herself up and drags the cart out of the way for people coming after.

Shiruba squints at the map, memorizing it... Then grabs one of the reprints offered because that will be easier to coordinate with others over, and hopes into a cart. They get the card going. "This is a great idea, the hot spots are deeper in the mine according to the map. It'll cut down travel time."

Of course it can't just be that easy. "Okay, maybe not such a good idea! Work fast people!" She shifts towards the back of the cart, turns around and has one of her moments of just casting magic directly instead of inbueing it through arrows, pointing her hands back and unleashing a wind spell like a thruster to give her cart the speed to make the gap jump! That and the momentum from the slope seems to be enough and after a brief airtime her cart hits the rails on the other side.

Sometimes, strength is the best way to accomplish things. Kotono takes a deep breath and begins pushing the mine cart with all of her might. She thinks she's got it going...

Only to fall over as her cart topples over.

"Not my day..." She says with a sigh.

Minecarts? This reminds her of an old platformer her father played back in the day, something about big monkies and banana theft. She also takes note of the Doc being here.

"Well we should have no issue in being well healed today."

She's in the carts and she get in she'll be casting spells but it doesn't go so well, the good news is? She isn't hit...and keeps going.

"Of course, we'll get right to it," Prophylaxis inclines his head pleasantly and moves quietly after the others into the deep, dark depths of the hungry earth. There are a few rules when it comes to places like these-- mines, that is. Mines have mine/carts/ and minecarts mean minecart rides. Prophylaxis takes up position near the rear of the cart as it sets off, enjoying the wind in his air and the stale, chill air at his face. It's almost thrilling, picking up speed like this! Faster and faster and faster and--

There's another rule with minecart rides.

Eventually, you will probably need to jump a gap.

"Mind your heads. Limbs inside the cart, please," the doctor instructs, before turning and--

Hurling an explosive fireball right behind the cart. The shockwave slams into their makeshift vehicle, giving it just enough additional air to make it across the gap...!

As to how it wasn't knocked off-target by such a haphazard solution-- don't worry about it, that's just how minecarts in video games work sometimes.

    At least there isn't a mob of goblins to shoot at the party on their way over the gap, this time. Miyako for one is grateful for that. "You're reminding me of why I hated roller-coasters!" she yells as she gives one last shove with her pole and the cart she's in goes flying across the gap, to land with a rather loud thump on the other side. Somehow, her shove managed to adjust its trajectory just enough that it lands back on the tracks, wobbles, and screeches to a halt as she applies the brake!

    "Damnit damnit damnit," the Spriggan mutters. "I love flying, but I like being in control of it!" She sighs and steps over to one of the fallen carts. "C'mon, let's get back on the track," she says, and bends to help lift it back into place.

    It's somewhat later, however, that things get a bit ... more annoying. The signs marking out the mine as under Guild control are not unexpected - after all, that's who hired the party. Convincing the guards that -haven't- been told to expect them, on the other hand, is going to take some work. "Awright, what the heck are you kids doing fartin' around with our carts? I oughta take you over my knee and paddle your behinds," the grizzled man growls. It does not seem as though he'll be easy to convince....

Goldenblade gets her cart back on the track and starts moving again, rolling on with the others until we arrive at some kind of checkpoint. "Wait," she says. "How is the checkpoint here if the track was broken across the chasm?" They must have missed some kind of alternate route. So much for the map. Or maybe this way was just faster?

But it's a gate, and a guarded one, and these fellows don't seem inclined to buy the story that the miners above sent us about the goblins. Do they like goblins? Luckily, they spot Goldenblade's Westelande badge, and there is a quiet conversation among the guards, and some discrete pointing, and she is allowed through with a brief word of warning about the goblins. "They won't be a problem," she promises them, and proceeds along.

You don't always have to be physical to achieve your goal.

Speaking in a firm but fair voice, Kotono attempts to reason with the goblins about this whole thing. She maintains a demeanor that indicates she's serious about this yet has no intent of fighting if she can help it.

And surprisingly, it works!

"Get more flies with honey than with vinegar," Kotono says with a smile.

Shiruba did not expect there to be a toll booth within the mine. But being the sort of Cait Sith she is she always has some extra forms of monetary assets on hands. Especially now that the art skills allow her to make more intricate maps to sell for a better price.

She lets Goldenblade's legendary status and those with negotiation skills work out a proper fee, then pools in her share with the others to cover the cost so they can e one their way with little fuss or delay.

Miyako hits the brakes! Prophylaxis braces against the side of the cart as it screeeeches to a halt. "At least jumping minecarts doesn't actually technically count as flying. Not that those damn gargoyles could get down after us," Prophylaxis says with a shrug, "Though ah, a little warning next time before you pull the brake?"

He could have hit his head! And his head is a /very/ important thing to keep intact.

But she did have a good reason, at least. The mining guild signs are something of an expected quantity, but... "Weren't we /working/ for the mining guild?" Prophylaxis asks, scratching his cheek. "Ah, pardon me sir, I don't think you were informed, but we're meant to be down here to take care of the goblins."

"And if our word isn't good enough," he conjures a bag full of coins that could substantiate a reasonably generous bribe. "Some incentive could grease the wheels somewhat, yes? If you don't mind also telling us a couple of things about the road ahead and what we might need to expect as we travel it, that is."

Gwen calls out. "What are you talking about Roller-Coasters are awesome!!" She does love flying too but not like this. she is able to avoid ening up going for an unfun flight. She fixes thing and will carry on with everyone else. As they deal with the guard she get an idea and will explain why they are here, which will up the mines profits due to not constantly fending off as many goblin attacks and notes she would put a good word in with their bosses for their asute understanding of what they were doing. At the worst some gold crossing palms will hopefully help.

    "Yes, yes we are," Miyako answers the Doctor. "Master Gwilliam asked us to take care of the Goblin Problem." Eventually, it seems, the guard is convinced, and the party is allowed to pass the checkpoint and proceed into the mines. "You lot better bring those carts back in one piece or they're coming out of your pay!" he roars after them.

    And deeper they go. It's fortunate they brought their own lights! But that's the sound of rushing water, "Maybe a nice place to stop for a break and a picnic," Miyako suggests with a wink to Kotono. Her fondness for water-side locations is well known, after all. As is her fondness for the other Spriggan.

    It is not, however, the best of times to stop for a picnic. The large apparently-carnivorous lizards swimming in the river have a vote on the subject, after all, and they vote that the adventurers ARE lunch.

    Can the party survive the lizards AND yet another track-jump?

    FIND OUT ON... ELDER TALE ONLINE!

Goldenblade rides along after they all get through the checkpoint, and she peers as she points up ahead and asks, "How deep does that water look?" Turns out, the answer is too deep. Luckily, the carts float, and the pole she was using to push, she can use as a crude oar. Unluckily, the river here is filled with leaping pirhana or something, they keep biting at her. She'll use her makeshift oar to beat back the pirhana, up until the waterfall, then she'll scream.

The cart plummets down the waterfall, but lands cleanly on the tracks below, and zooms along as if it were meant to be that way. "Waughhhhhh, who designed this track? Who thought it was a good idea to use it?????" as her voice fades into zooming along.

"Let's save the picnicking for after we get out of here," Kotono says with a slight smirk before she realizes that the carts are floating towards a waterfall... and that there are denizens of the cave that intend to eat these adventurers for lunch!

"Besides, it looks like someone else is intent on having us as part of their picnic!" The girl reaches for her blades before taking a different approach. She ducks down, curling herself into a ball and hugging her knees to her chest. Fortunately, she's able to conceal herself from the enemy.

The track-jump is what hurts the most, since it causes Kotono to bounce slightly as she gets back up. "Owww! Next time I'll bring a pillow or something!" She says as she rubs her bottom.

That matter was handled decently enough, and they are on their way once more.

Underwater rivers are not an uncommon thing. But Shiruba can't fathom why you would build a track leading right into sailing into the current, carts being built to float or not. There really isn't time to think too hard about it. Not when monsterous fish are leaping out of the river!

Though the first one that lunges towards Shiruba gets a hard rabbit kick to the face courtesy of Yojimbo the Bun-Bun sitting on her head. Then Shiruba reachs up to take him off her head, setting him down in the corner of the cart. "This is going to be rough, you better stay down here for the moment."

She then conjures one of her elemental shields around her cart. This has a number of effects. The most immeadiate being the protection from the leaping monsters. The other being the water shield helps keep the bouyancy and balance of the minecart going down the river. It's also a bit more protection against the shock of hitting the rails after going over the falls, allowing her to continue on the way... and a moment is only just that, as Yojimbo is already poking his head up over the front edge of the cart. Thankfully staying within the bubble shield though.

Gwen is glad to get past the guards without any issues really so they get back on her cart and calls back. "I intend to!" She hops back in and off she goes with her friend and the good news is she has some skill with water magic the bad news the light colours of her clothing. Oh well she's got to dal with this and she'll start casting the water spells a she goes.

"HEY HEY WE ARE NOT FOOD!"

Obviously you want to build a minecart right next to an underground river because of just how scenic it is! Everyone would want to ride the riverside minecart, right? You could sell tickets!

But the actual reason is probably much more mundane. An underground river can carve natural chasms through a cave system. If you can put one together, a bridge carrying a minecart overtop of a body of water like this one is useful. Especially considering the other helpful conveniences that having a moving body of water nearby can afford to any miners who need to fulfill certain... biological needs on the go.

That is: It's full of tasty, tasty fish.

...What?

These fish, however, are rather angry and bitey things, however. The doctor thankfully has a solution to such creatures, and it involves freezing them into solid, buoyant fishcubes that tumble harmlessly down off of that waterfall in the distance.

...Oh. That could also be a problem.

    it was - originally - Miyako's call to use the carts. Which given her grumblings about roller coasters makes NO sense whatsoever. Why would she want to try such a thing? That's what she's asking herself right this moment. And she's not liking the answers. Temporary insanity comes to mind. A fondness for Indiana Jones movies. ... no, definitely insanity.

    Perhaps fortunately, she fancies herself competant at water magics. Perhaps. The spell she chants is apparently meant to draw up a waterspout to catch the cars and lower them more gently to the tracks below. That... is a level of control and power she's not necessarily anywhere near ready for. By some miracle, however, she succeeds!

    On and on the tracks go, until - as the party passes through a massive chasm lined with palisades and basic buildings on either side - the first sign of actual GOBLINS appears. Crossbow-armed goblins pop up here and there along the walls to harass the adventurers. Time for the actual fight!

Goldenblade is just starting to catch her breath when we start coasting through the actual goblin areas. But it's an elevated track here, through an open area, not really a good place to be, what with goblin archers all around. The better part of valor wins out here, and she hunkers down in the cart, pulling her cloak over her head. With luck, the goblins don't notice Goldenblade hunkered down in the cart, and as we roll along, fewer and fewer shots spang off her cart as the goblins look for other targets. No fun shooting an empty cart, right?

Finally, some actual goblins! Unfortunately they have crossbows and have built fortifications along the railway.

Fortunately Shiruba has an answer for this, and it's interestingly enough not shooting back. Instead she grips the sides of her cart once more, and for a passing moment runes can be seen flickering on the sides as she casts one of her newer counterattack spells.

The goblins turn out to be fairly decent shots, but that turns out to work against them as every time one actually hits the cart the protective magic retaliates and the goblin that shot combusts.

What you can't see can, in fact, hurt you, despite what you might want to believe.

But what you can't see can't be hurt, can it?

Kotono decides that discretion is the better part of valor here, and she remains hidden as she evades the enemies. Keeping a low profile as best as she can, Kotono leaves those enemies wondering where she went.

Gwen has no issue with using the carts and her water magic ahs done well enough with the fish and everything seem to be doing prety wel until she notices there are goblins and they are dug in.

"EMPLACEMENTS!"

She has her shield out and is intercepting attacks at they come in like some kind of anime Jedi.

Prophylaxis was just thinking that these mines were surprisingly bereft of goblins for a supposed goblin-infested mine. Fish and greedy miners, sure, but no goblins at all! At least, when the infestation finally emerges to try and turn the intrepid adventurers into pincushions, it confirms that this adventure /wasn't/ completely farcical all along.

"Mind your heads," the doctor instructs, holding a palm open overhead to conjure a protective bubble of pure force. Crossbow bolts slam into the shield one after another, sending ripples pulsing across its surface.

...But none are moving fast enough to cause any meaningful breaches. Not yet, anyway.

    The fortications may be goblin-built, they may have been built by the guild miners, it's hard to tell - they're fairly basic. But effective enough to give the crossbowmen some confidence, and the adventurers some difficulty in shooting back. Hiding is also an effective tactic, the iron walls of the carts easily deflecting what crossbow bolts slam into them. Magical shields are also a help, and Miyako takes the time to cast a space-twisting bit of weirdness that sends the goblins' shots across the chasm and into their counterparts on the other side!

    Finally, the track comes to an end. "Looks like it's time to go to work," Miyako notes, braking her cart to a gentle halt. The gate and portcullis in the fortress wall are open, easing the group's way to discovering the inhabitants. Goblins.

    Goblins in crude but probably effective armor, drilling in actual military formations... well, close enough. The unpleasant point is that they're actually TRYING.

    "Welp. We knew this was going to happen sooner or later. Goblins aren't exactly non-sapient... if the Landers are more real than the game, who's to say goblins can't be, too?" Miyako glares out at the drilling would-be soldiers. "Ko-chan, how do you feel about sneaking around and finding the boss gobbo for us?"

Shiruba hops out of her cart as it rolls to a stop at the encampment. "Wow, they didn't really try to hide their presence much." She's got her longbow out and ready, drawing an arrow back in it.

But the goblins have prepared for ranged combatants this time it seems. "Their leader is near the center!" she calls out, even as she fires... and several goblins throw themselves in the path of the arrow to protect their leader. "Dammit!"

By that point the shieldbearers are moving into position to close the gap, forcing Shiruba to keep back since she doesn't have much in the way of close combat capability. Other than an angry bun-bun once again sitting on her head, making growls that sound more cute than intimidating.

"Sneaking isn't an option," Kotono says as she draws her blades. "It looks like I'm going to have to do a little slicing and dicing!"

The Spriggan leaps into action, attempting to take out those goblins...

Only to get caught by one of the goblins and taken down. What happens next can't be shown here...

She eventually emerges a bit bruised and says, "Even I make mistakes, so sue me!"

Ah, so there they are. The goblin commander actually looks like he has a decent head on his shoulders (and a decent hat on his head). That's probably why these goblins have been relatively more subtle than most. If they had a more brutish captain, chances are that there would have been signs of more activity closer to the surface. Instead, he's concentrated his forces around himself.

Smart.

That needs to be fixed.

Prophylaxis squints at the closing ranks of goblin shielders, and decides to act. With a snap of his fingers, a pulse of frigid air races through the goblin ranks. Where it passes, lesser goblins freeze solid in an instant, and the more powerful ones-- like those bearing shields-- are held fast to the spot, unable to form the ranks they were instructed to hold.

It's an opportunity for the others to exploit. They just need a single good shot on the goblin captain, now.

Goldenblade peeks up out of the cart as the rolling seems to slow and the ping of arrows ceases. "Looks like the end of the line," she observes. But there's some kind of goblin fortification up ahead. Goblins with ragtag weapons defending their domain but Goldenblade has other plans. She throws down the pole she'd been using to push and steer, causing her cart to jump the track, and with the freshly oiled wheels, it keeps most of its momentum as she ducks down and the cart plows hard into the mass of goblins and fortifications, causing a hell of a mess, with goblins and debris everywhere, and Goldenblade rising up out of the cart and beating the tar out of anything goblin-shaped. Blades flash, but most of the goblins in the immediate vicinity were stunned by the crash of her cart and don't even put up a fight.

"I have this."

Gwen notes As she start to shan and she brings up her shield again. From this comes a massive surge of magic and if anyone is paying attenion as this golden arua covers Gwen? A massive magical shield appears before her bearing the marks of all three of the goddesses now before he and it just not letting anything through as she charges forward.

    And of course some of the party can't wait to rush to the attack, instead of sneaking up as Miyako suggested. Ah well. It's not like any of them are named Leeeroy Jenkins, right? Right?

    Apparently they ARE.

    Miyako watches, staring in something resembling disbelief, as members of the team rush straight to the attack against the mass of goblins. Goblins who are at least attempting to fight as proper soldiers, not the indisciplined rabble the adventurers are used to. Some do better than others, but even so...

    The Spriggan sighs. She was hoping for something a bit more exploratory and a bit less smashy. The first parts of the cart ride were fun, at least. And she wants to go back to that waterfall. Preferably with a batch of lizard-repellent, Kotono, and a picnic lunch. Right now, though, she'll just slip through the shadows towards her target.

    With the leader taken out, the goblins' discipline collapses, and dispatching those that fail to flee is no longer a matter requiring much concern from the adventurers. A bit of work later, they can start trying to figure out how the miners got the carts from here, back to the surface.....

"I suppose we all have our bad days," Kotono says to Miyako as they clear things up. "Maybe if all is clear, we can go back to that waterfall and have that picnic? Although, honestly, I'd like to clean up a bit first." The girl rolls her arms around a few times before continuing. "For now, let's just get back to the surface."

Once the leader is dead and the organization of the goblins' scatters Shiruba has a much easier time at picking off those that try to flee or stubbornly stay to fight. Until the fight trickles down to an ending lull with no goblins left.

Once that's done Shiruba puts away her weapon and takes out the map. Unfurls it, and after a few moments of studying it deduces the route they took, where they are, and marks off that hot spot. Unfortunately that was far from the only one. "Looks like the Goblins have spread to different parts of the tunnels, we may have to do more hunting later to chase them out of all the corners."

A pause as she looks up. Then back at the map. And ... "Oh, they have a return passage marked for taking carts back to the surface to be unloaded."

Goldenblade was scrapping for a fight, it seems, and she's down a ton of hit points, not being quite as tough as she'd need to be to ignore the goblins' frantic self defense. But her attack is savage and unrelenting, and at the end of the day, she's a melee fighter in her element, smashing and stabbing in close quarters, with no mercy and no pause until the boss goblin is dead and the rest fled or dead. Panting, grinning, she looks around. "Well, now. I'd say that counts as putting down some goblins." She smirks, drags her cart, now twice off the track, back onto the track Shiruba has found to get it up to the surface.

    Miyako is just glad everyone survived. Especially Kotono. As the party debarks from the carts at the surface, hours later, she sends the rest on their way while she goes to meet with the guildsman to answer for the state of the sadly-abused carts.

Prophylaxis did not charge boldly down the center aisle! He was busy in the back, freezing goblins solid and making sure /they/ couldn't charge forward. Or meet any charges. Or really much of anything at all. He was helping!

And soon, the goblin captain is slain and the goblins themselves broken into a scatter. The doctor doesn't merely let them leave, instead bombarding the fleeing creatures with as much magic as he possibly can before they can squirrel away into the narrower passages.

"Hrmph. Didn't get them all," he grunts, resting his weight upon his staff. "Oh well. There's always next time, I suppose."